At A Loss Of Hope
by XxBloodyRosaryxX
Summary: Jasper is a 13 year old and has all the looks. Every girl loves him! but no one gets him.  He's is abused in every way possible. read to find out how Jasper deals with this. and thinks he's at a loss of hope. *DISCONTINUED*
1. Chapter 1

WARNING: This story contains abuse, bad language, and slight sexual abuse…but I won't go into detail.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

( Jasper P.o.v) he's only 13.

I cried out as my drunken step-father bashed my head into the refrigerator.

YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" he roared.

"I FEED YOU AND GIVE YOU A PLACE TO SLEEP! AND YOU TREAT ME LIKE SHIT!" he said every word with a kick to any part of my body he could.

Then, he grabbed me by the collar of my already torn shirt and pulled me to where I was eye- to –eye with him.

He dropped his beer bottle and used his fist to punch me in the face.

I screamed as I felt my lip burst open.

" You pathetic wimp, I'm embarrassed to call you me son." He said as he dropped me in the broken glass that was his beer bottle.

I watched as he wobbled up our stairs.

I fell back with a groan on the glass that was now covered in my blood.

I'm sure I fell asleep on there.

I woke up around 5:45.

I walked up the stairs and winced with every step.

My entire body hurt.

I finally got to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

I cringed at how hard the pressure would be on my already bruised flesh.

I slowly stripped naked and looked at myself.

I let out a moan of despair as I saw the many bruises, burn, and the scars.

I sighed.

I got in the shower but tried to avoid the water.

I stuck my head under the water and soaked it.

Then I grabbed the shampoo and conditioner of the shelf and washed my hair as fast as I could.

I rinsed it out and saw red on the shower floor.

I threw my head back and let out a moan.

I saw probably a half a gallon of dried blood on my body.

I grabbed the soap and a washcloth and lightly scrubbed the blood off.

It didn't hurt as much as I cooled the water down.

I smiled at how good it felt.

I stuck my head out and saw it was 6:34 and I turned the water off and stepped out of the shower.

I walked down the hall to my bedroom as quietly as possible.

I pulled on a long sleeved gray shirt that said 'Brokencyde' on it and some baggy grey-ish blue jeans.

I walked down stairs and pulled on my thick black boots that made me look like a punk.

I brushed my shaggy blonde hair with my fingers and grabbed an apple.

I ate half of it, threw it away and ran back upstairs to get my backpack and cell phone.

I grabbed a key to the house and booked it outside.

Once out there, I texted my friend and asked if his brother could give me a ride.

He said it was ok and to meet them at block buster which was just two blocks away.

I walked about halfway there when I heard a car behind me and saw my friend and his brother.

"Hey Jasper, come on." My friend, Gregory, said opening the door for me.

I smiled.

"Thanks for the ride, Jeremy." I told his brother.

Man, I sounded like shit.

Suddenly, their smiles turned into frowns.

Dude, you really need to call the cops or somethin'. I hate seein' you like this." Gregory said.

Gregory and Jeremy are the only ones who know about my dad, Fredric.

I made them promise not to tell anyone.

They are like my brothers.

I just shook my head violently and that caused me to give myself a head-ache.

I groaned grabbing my head.

Greg, that's Gregory's nickname, sighed and rummaged through his backpack.

Then he pulled out some Advil.

He handed me the bottle.

I took it and was about to dry swallow when….

NO! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DRY SWALLLOW BECAUSE IF YOU CHOKE I WILL NEVER BE YOUR FRIEND AGAIN! Plus the fact that you might mess up my interior." Jeremy said handing me a half empty water bottle.

I laughed and took it.

I took the Advil and rested my head on the window.

Greg grabbed my head and brought it to his lap.

It wasn't weird that he did that.

He always tried to help me.

He was just a good natured person and wanted to help.

I closed my eyes and pretty soon I was asleep.

I dreamt of the night my mom died.

DREAM…

I was only 9 years old.

"FREDRIC STOP!" my mother, Eliza, screamed and my father punched me over and over again in the stomach and the face.

SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU STUPID CUNT!" he screamed and dropped me.

He walked up to my mom and slapped her.

He pushed her down and grabbed a knife and cut off all of her clothes.

She laid there naked as my sick step-dad stared down at her.

Licking his lips he grabbed her and licked up her stomach.

He raped her and his back was to me so I didn't see that.

Thank god!

When he stopped he punched her.

Her eyes were tear stained and she put up with it.

My mother was a strong woman and my dad obviously had enough.

He grabbed a knife and dragged her to she was in front of me and before he plunged the knife in her heart she managed to get out.. ' Jasper I lov- ' AHHHHHHHHHHHH

END OF DREAM

I woke up screaming and crying.

I noticed that the car was pulled over in to the forest of Forks.

"Jasper, Jasper are you OK?" Jeremy said frantically.

Did you have the dream again?" Greg asked.

I nodded and he hugged me tightly.

I didn't care that he was hugging me.

To come clean, he was like my dad more than a friend but he wasn't all thing about me and stuff, not to mention that he was 16 and I was 13. He got held back and is in 8th grade with me.

He purposely asked if he could stay behind.

He didn't

"How about we don't go to school today. Jasper isn't doin' so well." Jeremy said taking the keys out of the car.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

They nodded.

"Won't your parents get mad?" I asked.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, we moved out, so now Jeremy is in charge of me." Greg said smiling brightly.

I nodded and my eyes got heavy.

"Sleep Jasper, you need it." Greg said.

Did you like it?

Can you review for me!

Please!

Well whatever!

Anyway!

I wanna give out a thanks to Icy Actress!

All of her abuse stories inspired me!

So….

THANK YOU, ICY!


	2. In The Car

(Jasper P.o.v)

I fell asleep again and dreamt of well..I couldn't remember. But it was scary because I woke up trembling and Greg's embrace tightened.

I couldn't even fall asleep if I tried after that.

"Hey, you guys wanna go get somethin' to eat?" Jeremy asked, starting the car.

"Well, we're going because I'm hungry." He said.

I just shrugged.

I grabbed my backpack and took out my un-finished homework, and started doing it.

"Jasper, we aren't going to school." Greg said grabbing my history book.

"But, but, but….humph." I said crossing my arms.

We drove into this circular looking area that had endless fast-food places.

"Where to? I asked.

They said two different things so I couldn't comprehend what they said.

"Uhhhhhhhhh?" I said.

"Lets go to..BURGER KING!" Greg said.

"OK!" Jeremy screamed.

I just sighed.

Then I frowned.

"You guys can eat…I don't have any money." I said.

Just then my stomach growled.

"Um, yea, Jasper, does Fredric feed you?" Greg.

"If he has time. So only like three times every two months." I said.

"YOU ONLY EAT THREE TIMES EVERY TWO MONTHS" Greg screamed.

"No, I sometimes have to steal..food…if he locks the kitchen, if he doesn't I try to find something .

I said hiding my face in Greg's chest.

I'm gonna say this again: I'M NOT GAY!

I just feel safe with him there because he is like my father, or a brother.

"You can't help it, Jasper, so don't sweat it, you have a bastard for a dad." Jeremy said as he reached back and messed up my hair.

I groaned and fixed it.

"HAHAHAHA! Jasper, you messed it up more!" he screamed.

I groaned again.

Greg just laughed and brushed it with a brush he kept in his backpack.

He puts a BUNCH of things I might need in his backpack.

"Damn, Jasper, do you own a brush?" Greg asked.

I shook my head.

He just smiled and continued to brush while Jeremy ordered .

(AN: to lazy to write how it went down but they got a lot of food)

We ate it and had a bunch left over.

"DAMMIT YOU GUYS! Why do you have to buy all of this. I can't pay you back." I said and Greg glared at me and pointed at my food. "Eat." He said.

I shook my head and pushed it out of the way.

He growled.

"EAT!" Greg screamed.

"AHH! DON'T SCREAM!" I screamed.

He growled, again.

"OK! OK!" I said and started eating.

Once we were finished we went to Jeremy's new house and I finally fell asleep.

That time I didn't have a dream…

TBC….


	3. Waing up to Horror

(Jasper P.o.v)

I woke up to…

'WHO LIVES IN A PINAPPLE UNDER THE SEA(SPONGEBOB SQUARE PANTS)!'

I groaned and rolled over, only to fall over onto the floor.

"Jasper! Are you Ok?" Greg asked and picked me up.

I nodded and looked at the clock, I read: 6:30.

"SHIT!" I yelled.

"What? Are you ok." Greg asked frantically.

I shook my head and pointed at my cell phone.

'Call from Fredric'

He never called unless I was in trouble.

I ran to the sink and barfed up all I ate.

I sank to the floor and curled up into a ball and cried my eyes out.

"Jasper, Jasper, its ok, don't worry. Go to Blockbuster tomorrow morning and we'll meet you there, we don't have to go to school." Greg said as he hugged me and kissed my head.

IN A FRIENDLY WAY!

I think….

I got up and RAN out the door and didn't stop until I got to the house.

I walked in and tried to get upstairs without Fredric knowing until…..

"ARE YOU TRYING TO RUN FROM ME! COME AND TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT! BASTARD!"

I walked down the stairs and saw HIM waiting for me.

" I'm sorry, I was at a friends." I said.

He grunted and grabbed my arm.

He swung me over his lap and tore off my jeans and boxers and pushed my shirt up to my shoulder blades.

He took off his belt and swung it around my neck so he had me in a noose like thing and pulled on it.

I choked and tried to pull it from him but it didn't work.

He grabbed my belt and brought it down on my back.

I screamed but it sounded more like a dying seal.

He kept bringing the belt ( which had studs) down on my ankles up to my shoulder blades for up to 45 minutes.

SORRY SO SHORT!

NEXT WILL BE LONGER AND THE ABUSE WILL CONTINUE INTO THE NEXT ONE!


	4. OWWWIIEEEE

(Jasper p .o .v)

He finished the whipping and dropped me on the floor.

Fredric walked into the kitchen and came out with lemon juice and a sponge.

The sponge was one of the ones that are used for cars, so it was really rough.

I reached back to touch my raw back without taking my eyes offa the sponge.

He dunked the sponge in the lemon juice ( don't ask why he had lemon juice already squeezed just read the damn story) and walked behind me.

That's when I realized what he was going to do.

I was frozen with terror.

He laughed and I felt the juice fall on my back.

I screamed so loud that it echoed through-out the house.

He just poured the whole bucket on my back and started rubbing it in with the sponge.

"You use to like it when daddy bathed you when you were hurt remember." He said in a mock baby voice.

He wrapped his arms around me and I froze.

I felt him shift so that I was sitting between his legs and I felt something a kid should never feel.

I felt nails digging into my thigh and they moved…up.

I pulled my elbow back and got him in the chest.

I grabbed my hair and threw me about 10 feet.

I screamed and everything went black.

I woke up and checked the clock.

6:30.

I got up and walked up the stairs and it didn't hurt since he didn't kick me but when I got in the bathroom, that was another story.

I stripped and turned the water on.

I put it on cold and got in.

Surprisingly, it felt good, but I was shivering.

I went really fast and got out at about 6:58.

I walked to my room and pulled on a stretched out black long sleeved shirt that had red, white, and gray splatters all over it and some baggy jeans.

Tight fitting clothes would do me no good.

I walked back into the bathroom and brushed my teeth, which I forgot to do yesterday.

I got my boots out of my closet.

This pair was too big on me and they were black.

I texted Greg, and told him to meet me at Blockbuster.

I walked out the door and my skin felt tight.

I walked, no more like limped, across the street.

And I heard a car behind me again and saw Greg and Jeremy.

They smiled, but I didn't have the energy to smile back.

Greg's eyes widened at what I was wearing.

He was pretty smart so I'm guessing he found out.

For right when I came in and didn't sit down he asked: "WHAT DID HE DO TO YOU!"

I didn't get time to respond when he pulled my shirt up over my head and spun me around.

He gasped and turned me back around.

Took my jeans and shoes off and I was standing there in boxers.

He spun me around again and stared for I second.

When he touched me I flinched and he whimpered.

I turned around and started crying.

He was going to hug me, but when he made contact I screamed.

Instead he just stared into my eyes for a second before he kissed me on the cheek.

I touched my cheek and blushed.

"You know I didn't mean it like that…" he said and playfully mock punched my arm.

I pulled my clothes on and was going to sit down when Greg shook his head.

I sighed and laid down on my stomach and rested my head in his lap.

He patted my head and smiled.

I soon fell asleep.

(AN: REMEMBER! GREG IS 16 AND JASPER IS 13! THIS IS NOT AN M/M. because that's messed up)

I dreamt of the previous night.

I woke up to Greg shaking my.

I groaned and started crying.

Later on in the day…..

We went to the grocery store a.k.a Albertsons.

I got to stay in the car, 'cuz I'm a big boy…kinda.

But anyway we were driving back and they dropped me off at home..HORROR.

I walked in and saw Fredric on the couch watching t.v.

I tried to go up the stairs but I felt a hand on my shoulder….

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN!


	5. Confessing

To mimi: I will make some….stuff happen in this chap….nothing bad though…..

(Greg's P.o.v)

I'll admit it, I love Jasper, I never wanted to be gay, and I'm not, I just love him.

It's very hard to explain.

I love him so much one minute and the next it hurts to look at him.

Hard, isn't it.

Anyway, with that off my chest I was so worried about Jasper, like I always am when he's at home.

I was sitting in my bed curled up in a tiny ball and had my thumb in my mouth and had tears in my eyes.

I swallowed and got in the shower, I needed to help him.

But I couldn't.

He told me not to worry, he was going to do something, I had to do what the love of my life told me to.

I trust him.

(Jasper P.o.v)

I turned around, and saw my dad glaring daggers at me.

He dragged me to the couch and threw me down.

"Your principal called and said you were skipping school, I don't wanna raise a stupid kid, HA, who am I kidding, you are stupid, but I guess that means that your gonna have to get punished." He smiled.

He grabbed my arm and tied me to a pole we had that supported the kitchen.

He walked outside and came back with one of those branding things that you use for cows.

I squirmed and tried to get out of the ropes and screamed when he came closer.

I looked at the iron and saw it was just a straight line.

It was GLOWING red and I was shaking with fear.

He pressed it to my now bare chest and I screamed so loud it wasn't even funny.

I was in tears now and he kept walking back and forth getting the iron flaming hot and cooling it down on my skin.

By now I had burns all over me and I was scared to death.

Eventually he stopped and passed out up stairs.

But he cut the ropes first.

I was lying on the floor in a little ball.

I was in a puddle of him booze so it stung, bad.

I wanted Greg and Jeremy.

I started crying loudly.

Well not loud enough to wake Fredric.

Morning came quick and I stayed up all night crying.

I got up and shuffled to my bathroom and filled the bathtub and sat inside the COLD water.

It felt good and I was enjoying it until I remembered at around 7:30 I had to start walking to Blockbuster.

I looked at the clock 1:03 am.

I sighed.

Awesome!

I had time to kill.

At around 2: 20 I got out and dried off slowly and carefully.

I brushed my teeth and walked to my room.

I put on baggy jeans and a short sleeved shirt with 'JUST DO IT' printed on the front.

I smiled.

I kinda had a dirty mind.

The clock read 3: 45.

Damn it took me that long.

I pulled on some converse and sat down, still a bit sore from the whipping.

I watched T.V till 7:28.

I better get going.

I grabbed my backpack and limped to Blockbuster.

Not getting very far, of course not all the way till I heard that same car.

I turned and saw Greg driving but no Jeremy.

I gave a questioning look and he said he got sick.

Weird he was fine yesterday.

Or was he?

"OH MY GOD! What did he do this time?" he asked.

I told him the whole story.

His eyes widened and told me he didn't care what happened he was going to call the police and take me to the spot that we always go to.

I've grown to love that place.

He climbed in the back and he stared in my eyes.

He slowly took my clothes off and saw the burns.

He broke down in tears and so did I.

He recovered before me.

He looked down at me.

(I was only in boxers)

He touched each of the scars and then cupped my face and kissed me.

He pulls back and his eyes widen.

"I-I didn't mean to."

I smiled and started kissing him.

He hugs me and licks my bottom lip asking for enterance.

To tease him, I didn't let him in.

He glared and bit my bottom lip.

I shook my head and giggled in his mouth.

He brought me to my knees and smacked my ass.

I shrieked and bit his tounge.

He smacked me again.

Humph.

I let him in and he rubbed what he just abused and I smiled.

We broke apart and stared at each other and I lunged at him and started crying into his chest.

Mimi, I didn't know if that's what you meant but I tried.

I don't do good at writing gay-ness!1


	6. ICE CREAM AND WISCONSIN

Same p.o.v

I cried and he hugged.

I looked up at him and he kissed me.

FINALLY!

SOMEONE WHO ACUALLY LOVES ME!

I looked down and blushed crimson.

He just laughed and kissed my cheek.

Well, he licked the tears away.

But its all the same.

I just remembered something.

"Greg! My dads gonna be gone all week starting tomorrow."

His eyes widened.

He said, " JASPER! What if you get your stuff and move into my place! Then we can move to like…WISCONSIN!" he screamed completely serious.

I laughed.

"HAHAHAHAAHAH! GREG WHERE DID WISCONSIN COME FROM!" I laughed

He 'humphed'.

I smiled.

Then he poked my stomach and I laughed then he full on started to tickle me.

I was laughing so hard.

Then he abruptly stopped.

"I like your laugh, its really cute." He said and blushed.

I blushed.

"I want ice cream." I said.

He nodded and was about to get up when he looked down and as did I .

I was sitting on him.

I giggled and got off.

We drove to Rite Aid since it was cheap and had really good candy.

We went back to the car and Greg was eating Cotton Candy and I had Mint N' Chip.

I was eating in the back with Greg next to me.

He got some on the side of mouth and he didn't notice.

So I crawled up to him and licked it off.

He laughed and shoved his ice cream onto my face.

All of it on my face.

"That was a waste." I said.

He shook his head, took my shirt off and put the ice cream on my chest.

I shivered and he ate it off my chest and I laughed through out the whole thing.

And I did the same to him.

SORRY SO SHORT!

IDEAS! IDEAS!


	7. The True Feeling Of Losing Hope

I had to go back home and I felt weird, like someone was watching us….

So when I got home my dad was on the porch.

I looked down and he grabbed my hair.

I screamed out and he brought me up stairs and stripped me.

He brought me to his bed and said: " so you gay! I saw you in the car with Carl!"

Carl?

"His name is Greg."

Right when I said that he smacked me, in a place that the sun doesn't shine.

My eyes widened and I went to grab myself but he caught my hand and tied them to the bed post and tied my legs down and I was trembling.

He walked out of the room and came back with whips and razor blades.

"PLEASE DADDY! DON'T! I PROMISE I WON'T DO ANYTHING ANYMOORE!" I screamed out.

He laughed and said: "We have to make this quick, I have to leave at 10."

Then he brought the whip down on my face.

I started crying immediately.

He laughed and brought it down again and again.

He then made the whip like a noose and choked me I almost fell unconscious but he poured booze on my face.

I jumped and he got on top of my knees.

"STOP JERKING BOY!" he screamed.

Then he grabbed the razor blades.

He dragged it up my legs and all the way up the side of my face.

It burned but he didn't car.

He stabbed my side and tore it out.

I cried and begged him to stop but he stabbed and slashed and then he went to my neck.

Then he groaned.

"I have to go, I'll be make to punish you more in about a week, if your still alive." He said laughing.

He walked out the door and I heard the car.

'I HAVE (I HAVE) YOU BREATHING DOWN MY NECK (BREATHING DOWN MY NECK) I DON'T (DON'T KNOW) WHAT YOU COULD POSSIBLY EXPECT UNDER THIS CONDITION SO I'LL WAIT (I'LL WAIT) FOR THE AMBULANCE TO COME (AMBULANCE TO COME) AND PICK US UP OFF THE FLOOR WHAT DID YOU POSSIBLY EXPECT UNDER THIS CONDITION.'

Dark Blue started playing.

I screamed out as the cuts burned.

I cried and cried.

GREG SAVE ME!

**Day 1**

**Day 2**

**Day 3 **

**Day 4**

IT WAS PAINFUL!

I could not stand it anymore.

I'm at a loss of hope!

"JASPER! JASPER WHERE ARE YOU!" the familiar voice screamed.

GREG!

I was too weak.

I moaned and rattled the chains.

Then the door swung open.

Greg broke down crying and untied my.

He booked it down the hall into my room and got sweats and a tee-shirt.

He pulled them on and picked me up bridal style.

He kissed me on the lips and walked as fast as he could to his car and drove the way to the hospital.

"No." I croaked.

He sighed and made a U turn and drove to his house.

When we got there he laid me on the couch and ran to Jeremy's room he said something and ran to the bathroom.

SORRY I'M STOPPING IT NOW!

I HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE!


	8. Authors Note

Authors note:

Okay, im not going to say im sorry because im not. But Mimi, I cannot write slashes anymore. I am too young…..i can but I choose not too. So im going to take that slash-ness out of my story.

Thanks so much,

KsceneK


	9. Chapter 9

(Jasper's p.o.v)

I decided on telling Greg that it just won't work out.

I'm 13 and he's 16.

Not a good match.

I was online right now even though Greg told me not to go on, I apparently needed to rest, I do, don't get me wrong, but I want a plane ticket to…Texas!

I wanna start a new life there, I could get my own place and I could meet a girl, I don't like the feeling of being gay, it's….awkward.

So I have the plane tickets and I leave in two weeks, I'll spend that amount of time Greg and Jeremy.

Yeah, it's all gonna work out!

**SORRY SO SHORT I JUST NEEDED TO CLEAR THING UP!**

**AND FROM HERE ON OUT, IT'LL BE SEMI HUMOR!**

**IF YOUA PROBLEM WITH IT, IN YOUR REVIEW TELL ME!**

**I'LL WAIT THREE DAYS AND THEN I'LL PUT UP HE CHAP. HUMOR, OR NON- HUMOR!**

**DEPENDS ON YOUR REVIEW!**


End file.
